Recently, there’s been a disagreement between me and my brother about who should pay for his wedding, which has caused some tension.

Here’s what happened:

I’m a 32-year-old woman who worked hard for everything I have. Growing up, my parents spoiled my younger brother, Jake (29), while I had to figure things out on my own. I worked part-time jobs to save for college, while they covered his hobbies, car, and rent well into his 20s.

Now I have a good job, a house, and savings, while Jake is just starting to get his life together. He’s getting married and wants a lavish wedding—destination, designer dresses, everything. My parents can’t afford it, so they asked me to pay, saying, “Jake deserves this, and you’re doing well.”

I refused. If Jake wants a big wedding, he should pay for it himself. My parents tried guilt-tripping me, saying, “Family helps family,” and Jake’s been making passive-aggressive comments. Even some friends said, “Why not help if you can afford it?” But why should I?

I worked hard, budgeted, and made sacrifices. Jake never did. It’s not my responsibility to fund his dream wedding just because I’m successful. People agree—he needs to live within his means.