70-Year-Old Widow Wants To Marry Again – Posts Hilarious Single Ad In Newspaper That Goes Viral

Getting back into the dating world can be strange, and intimidating, especially if it’s been a long time since you were last single. Of course, the most important lesson to remember is that it’s crucial you stay open to others and don’t judge anyone too quickly.

It was with that in mind that I decided to share a funny story I recently came across online. It involves a 70-year-old widow, a newspaper advert, and a search for a new husband.

She was at home one day when her doorbell suddenly rang … only, she couldn’t possibly have predicted who would be on the other side.

Read the full hilarious joke below — and make sure you stick with it until the punchline.

A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again…

She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

“Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person.”

The following day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs.

“You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you?” the widow asked: “Just look at you — you have no legs!”

The old gent smiled: “Therefore, I cannot run around on you!”

“You don’t have any arms either!” she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled: “Therefore, I can never beat you!”

She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: “Are you still good in bed?”

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said: “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”

Why not help cheer a friend up? Share this joke and help give someone a good laugh!

Related Posts

A Birthday Gift Gone Wrong

On my birthday, my husband gave me a shower gel. Since we had no financial difficulties, I felt deeply hurt, though I didn’t let it show. I…

Princess Catherine with kids princess Charlotte Prince George lovely scene royalsfamily

Barbour is still a popular royal apparel brand, although Princess Diana may have worn it best. Diana adored Barbour, and her journey to the Outer Hebrides in…

First Democrat 2028 Presidential Contender Emerges — A Shocking Twist in Michigan!

In a surprising turn of events that could reshape the 2028 presidential race, Pete Buttigieg, long considered one of the rising stars in the Democratic Party, has…

Breaking News. Donald Trump signs a decree to buy everything…

President Trump has recently signed several executive orders:He directed the Treasury and Commerce Departments to create a sovereign wealth fund to support government investments, including potential acquisitions…

Oprah Winfrey Plans Exit From USA Following Announcement of Her Appearance On ‘The View’…Oprah Winfrey’s move

Is Oprah Considering Leaving the U.S.? Sources say Oprah is frustrated by recent political and cultural shifts, particularly a “red wave” she finds troubling. Though she’s avoided…

American Couple Pay For Everyone’s

An American couple, Sarah and Bill, decided to show their support for Canadians after the U.S. president signed an order imposing tariffs on Canada. The order claimed…